It takes guts to be obedient

In today’s religion; the one I see as 21st Century ‘Christianity’: it’s as if we’re just not meant to suffer. Honestly. You couldn’t make it up.

If anyone is facing a real trial that will take their home and other extravagances from them; should they voice it to anyone and really spoil their day, or should they go it alone and not bother anyone? You know – if we voice these things that happen to us we’re usually held down as negative thinkers, instead of positive.

Come again?

I mean, really! Like, in my case. I’m almost £1,300 in debt over care charges. This will probably end up even worse as I expect my claim for ESA to fail. Something will go wrong with it. When it does, instead of bringing my husband out of care and becoming his murderer – I would rather give up this property; have all my claims closed, bar my husband’s income. It’s the only way out for me that I can see, as again, just as when hubby lived with me – no one wants to help or advise. Only buck-passing is available. Sorry, I just haven’t got the time for any more of it.

Look, folks – what am I supposed to do? Am I supposed to ‘magic up’ some kind of miracle, pretending that ‘something nice will happen’ (when it’s already been obvious for seven long years that it won’t), so that others don’t have to be burdened, or bored to death with my trials? Or do I cope alone, telling no one about any of it, and walk away, if I have to, to save a person’s life?

We’re supposed to die to ourselves. We’re supposed to follow Christ. That includes me. So, what am I supposed to do? Make up some fluffy comment to “cheer everybody up”? Or am I supposed to do all I can do to lay down my life for another?

Of course it’s hard. Of course I won’t like having to live without a roof, if that’s what ends up happening. But if it does, I won’t be the only one it’s happened to. And why should anyone pretend it really matters that much?

Comfort, or Christianity. Which one should I choose? That’s all I need to know, for crying out loud. Plus the encouragement to get on with it. Sorry to blatter on, but a phone call tonight, yet again, filled me with “grrrrrrr!!!” noises.

Advertisements

About tellthetruth1

The blog site is up and running. Please feel free to visit if you want to know the Lord. I treasure His Scriptures and pray you do, also. I've been a Christian since October 2009. The Lord saved me that month and has led me through many things in life. The one thing I adore Him for is bringing me the Light of Salvation and for forgiving me my wickedness.
This entry was posted in Faithfulness and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to It takes guts to be obedient

  1. Wally Fry says:

    Hey Jen

    “If anyone is facing a real trial that will take their home and other extravagances from them; should they voice it to anyone and really spoil their day, or should they go it alone and not bother anyone?”

    Voice it. That’s one of the things Jesus’ Church of for is supporting the Brothers and Sisters.

    Many prayers in this trial.

  2. tellthetruth1 says:

    Wally – what I can never make clear to a certain person is that, no matter how hard I prayed when I was living alone with dementia and getting absolutely no support, for years on end; only selfish platitudes and this person saying they were able to get help for their needs – you can’t imagine (I hope) what that did for my mental state for all that time. Blardy nightmare being told I’m just negative.

    Negative? You’d better believe it. Health care is not in crisis any more. It rolled to the edge of a cliff and got kicked over it. Especially in my area, along with most of the rest of the country. There’s just nothing there, unless you’ve worked in the system and know the trigger words to get it.

    It took a crisis, yet again, (as if two strokes weren’t enough for hubby), before we got the help we could have used years before.

    Then came the costing for it. What we are charged is based on a fictitious figure husband is supposed to be getting. He doesn’t. His income is way below what was stated.

    Just read the news about government claims over here. T’would make your hair curl. Again, I’ve prayed for help. Again, it hasn’t come. I can only assume I’m under judgement to have been through all this.

    I DO expect things to fail. I will not bring him out of care just to make financial life better. Because it won’t be better. Ever. All I’ll succeed in doing is killing my husband who would have to go without care again, and we’d both be back to being abandoned. Again. I will not do it, Wally. He may be old and sick, but I will not be made a pawn in this sick game for anyone. I’d give my own life first, if it came to that.

    Shucks! I’ve written anuvver blog post, hahahahahahaha 😀

Comments are closed.